In order to Do What Can’t Be Done, we use the classic Remove, Replace, Retest, Repeat model to change our mindset of doubt and negativity to one of belief and positivity. Yesterday we Removed the problem (Get Off the Doubt Hamster Wheel). Today we Replace it with positivity.
After removing a pathogen or problematic entity, it is advisable to replace it with something that will encourage health. This helps to take up space that would normally be prime real estate for other bad guys to move back in and cause more problems. Using this model for negative a mindset or lifestyle works in the same way. Once you remove doubt–which never really goes away, it is still lying under cover waiting for an opportunity to butt back in–you have to replace it with a positivity.
This morning Shaun White was being interviewed on a morning show after having won his third gold medal in three separate Olympics (a record, by the way). The interviewer asked if he knew that he had it in him all along or if he had to struggle to get the gold. He answered (of course I’m paraphrasing), “When I was on the chairlift on my way back up to the top (for his third run) I thought, I don’t have it in me. Then I thought, this is who I am, this is what I do, of course I’ve got this. Then I went back and forth, but when I was staring at the flags that show how much wind is out there I dug deep and found what I needed to bring it.”
How do you fill up that well inside so that when you dig down there is something to draw from? How do you keep doubt in its place and not let it attack at moments like this?
Find encouragement. Someone who will have your back, or talk you down from a cliff, or listen to your word diarrhea as you discover your true feelings. This can be a coach, a positive group of friends, a teacher, a counselor, a trusted family member, or strangers in a Facebook group dedicated to encouraging each other. Don’t hang around people you don’t want to be like or who don’t support your cause. Replace your negative friends with positive ones.
Sign up for motivational newsletters, read books, start following personal development blogs, listen to Ted Talks, listen to podcasts in your area of growth, join groups of like-minded people, attend workshops, lectures, masterclasses, and webinars. It doesn’t seem to matter whether you do these things online or in person. In fact, if you are introverted, maybe concentrate on the podcasts, webinars, and online groups first then branch out. Start participating in these groups. Leave comments, engage in conversations, and answer questions to practice putting yourself out there in a positive environment.
What you’ll discover from getting out there and participating in groups is that the successful people are just like you. They had to overcome some stuff to get where they are. In fact, the ones who went through the most adversity have the best stories. Shaun White said that if he had won at the last winter Olympics he might have been done with the sport. Instead, he recognized that he still had things to learn. He ended up coming back even stronger. Don’t think that you have to create greater adversity to be a greater success, however. Start where you are and move forward.
Keep track of your successes and celebrate them. At the end of each day remind yourself of the progress you made. Some days will be more successful than others. Even if you didn’t win that day, if you learned something, that’s a win in my book. Even 1% better counts as a win.
You will realize after entrenching yourself in positivity and hearing “can” enough times that your friends over in “Can’t Land” are awfully limiting and actually kind of sad. This may make getting off of the hamster wheel easier. It also may turn some of your friends off. Not everyone is going to be supportive of your journey and that’s okay. It’s your journey, after all, not theirs. Not everyone has to understand that.
Check back tomorrow for Nurture Belief in Yourself. This is also under the Replace heading. Tomorrow we’re replacing doubt with belief.
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